Stasi took the cup from Spider, but quickly set it aside on the counter and reached to grab his hand with both of hers, tugging him towards her and into the restroom.
"It can wait, моя любовь. Come here." She urged. _________________ Butts n' butts n' butts n' butts.
Stasi reached behind Spider to close the door behind him before allowing her expression to pinch softly, showing her nerves then.
“No-I mean, I’m okay right now. I just…I went to get the new box of toothpaste and-“ she faltered slightly before stepping away and going to pull open the drawer. Like before, everything tumbled forward, including the pregnancy test box. _________________ Butts n' butts n' butts n' butts.
Spider was fairly perceptive. Though it had not dawned on him before, when the pregnancy test tumbled out of the overcrowded drawer, he could not ignore it. His green eyes flit right to it, it had landed on top of everything else, it almost seemed cosmically intentional. They had not been trying to get pregnant, however Spider immediately recalled the intimate moments when they were not careful. He immediately felt some twist of guilt, Stasi’s pregnancies had not been viable in the past, he knew how badly it hurt her; physically and emotionally. It affected Spider too of course, but Stasi would carry the brunt of it no matter what the context. But there was nothing to do without knowing for sure, and there was only one way to find out.
“Do you want to take it?” He asked her, pushing the bathroom door shut behind them with his heel. He wanted them to have privacy from Nikita, whatever was to happen next.
Stasi’s expression remained troubled as she looked down at the box, more than troubled, she looked anxious.
She knew, logically, there was nothing to be done before confirming or dispelling a pregnancy, but the anxiety came from the question of and then what? If she found out she wasn’t pregnant, of course they could just write this off as some other ailment and Nikita was right in there probably being a pill or at least some other treatment that Peter could provide. This outcome would certainly bear some sort of disappointment, but it would probably be one that she could ensure. On the other hand, if she found out she was pregnant…
The knot forming in her chest at that sentiment was equal parts excitement and dread. Ever since her first pregnancy, she knew she wanted to be the mother of Soider’s children. She dreamt often of holding a little boy with fair hair and Spider’s glittering emerald eyes, a little boy who had Spider’s tender smile and his quiet spirit. But beyond that dreaming came the painful reality of how her body had betrayed her at every turn so far and could possibly turn on her again. She so badly wanted a baby for them, but she feared another loss as well.
She swallowed the knot down and reached for the test.
“I mean…I should, shouldn’t I?” She asked, though her gaze remained fixed on the box in her hand. _________________ Butts n' butts n' butts n' butts.
Spider reached to hold the hand that gripped the pregnancy text.
"We will do whatever you want to do, however you want to do it, I will be here and I will find a way to make it okay." Spider said. His phrasing was always a little bit strange, but he was always sincere in whatever he was saying. He knew the gravity of what a pregnancy would mean for them, for Stasi, and what the may potentially have to endure. But he meant it, whatever he would have to do, he would absolutely do it for Stasi.
"No matter what, I am here with you." He reassured.
There was an ache in Stasi's chest that she didn't even know was there until she felt it release at Spider's words. Her expression was still stormy, but she mustered a small smile before using her free hand to grab at Spider's, clasping their hands together between them.
"I know, I think...I'm just worried, but I know you'll be with me so I know it won't eat me up. It's just scary any ways." She admitted. _________________ Butts n' butts n' butts n' butts.
"You always do." Stasi said quietly, her voice further softened as she spoke into the fabric of his shirt. She lingered there for a beat, then two, listening to the steady rhythm of Spider's heart and trying to align hers to it. She took a steeling breath and pulled away then, one hand still lingering on Spider's waist where she had rested it while the other raised up the test box. She managed a more normal smile, almost impish. "Turn around, I'd like to maintain a little mystery in our brand new marriage."
((FF))
After doing what needed to be done, Stasi set the test on the counter furthest from she and Spider, washed her hands, and allowed herself to be enveloped by him while they waited. She loosely encircled his hips with her arms, linking her pinkies behind him while she rested her head against his chest.
"What are you hoping for?" She asked him in the quiet between. She raised her head, resting her chin on his chest to look directly up at him. "And don't tell me 'whatever I want', I know you'd support me either way, but what are you hoping for, моя любовь?" _________________ Butts n' butts n' butts n' butts.
Spider took a moment to get his words in order. He knew his answer definitively, but wanted to be careful in how he verbalized it.
“I hope, I get to see you be a mom.” Spider began after his thoughtful pause. “If it is to a little you, or me, I would love that. Even if it’s just us and Nikita,-pfft.” Spider scoffed at the notion out loud. But it was true, if all they had were each other and their young ward, he would be happy with that. Seeing Stasi parent Nikita was a treat, if she could parent anyone at all, Spider would like to see it.
Stasi let out her own chuff of laughter at Spider's scoff and she reached up to softly rake her nails at the back of his head where his hair was shorn.
"If it was just me, you, and Nikita, who would you get to parent?" She lightly teased. "I wouldn't mind it so much...if it were just the three of us. I know Nikita is a handful, but I love her all the same..." Stasi paused briefly. "But...I'd like to have your baby. I'd like us to have a little baby with a bit of me and a bit of you." She admitted. _________________ Butts n' butts n' butts n' butts.
Spider continued to hold onto Stasi, turning his cheek to comfortably rest his face atop her head. He hummed thoughtfully as he listened to Stasi, he understood her perfectly.
“I would parent Nikita with you, I would parent anyone with you.” Spider said before adjusting to look at the pregnancy test on the counter. “Shall I see?” He asked.
Stasi turned her head to look over at the test as well, taking a brief pause before lightly patting her hands at either of Spider's sides and taking a half step back.
"No use in hesitating, hm?" She said. _________________ Butts n' butts n' butts n' butts.
"I've never known you to do so." Spider said, releasing Stasi and side stepping around her to grab the test. He was took it off the counter and held it faced down away from himself first before flipping it over quickly. He was quiet, if Stasi was awaiting to hear some sort of reaction, she wouldn't hear one. Finally he looked over his shoulder at her, his expression still not betraying anything.
Stasi swallowed hard at the suggestion, fighting back nerves and maybe a bit of bile still, and then stepped over. She moved slow, as if her hesitation weighted all her movement, and paused at Spider’s side. She didn’t quite want to look, nervous either way about the result, but as soon as her gaze fell on the little digital screen she sucked in a breath and let out a surprised little “oh”.
It was positive.
Her chest shuddered a bit and her hand shakily went to grab at her middle. There was nothing there yet, but inside of her was a brand new little life and while she desperately wanted it to stay, it was still admittedly nerve wracking. _________________ Butts n' butts n' butts n' butts.
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